A duck has been killed so I can have a roast duck salad for my tea. It was very ducky and fatty too. I engorged my gastric pouch with its water fowl goodness.

Oh! Haggis forms a coalition with a group of left wing baked beans that have assimilated some very tiny plum tomatoes. Oh! The politics of chomping have been changed for all time.

Glisteny, shiny tuna charlies speak for themselves.

This treasured implant of eggy goodness plays a game of 3D chess with several of the electromagnetic mind games to which we have become bemused in recent years. Surley it is now time for more cake,

Flora and Golden Shred and their twins have just left the Ryanair flight from George Harrison airport and are now off for a meeting with Mr Arthur Askey the King of Comedy.

A loin of fishy smelling cod is astride a bed of rocket leaves while grilled redskins fester in an oily manner atop some olive bread.

Richard of York gave battle in vain.